Whats the weirdest thing you have seen whilst paddling

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sshearing228
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Whats the weirdest thing you have seen whilst paddling

Post by sshearing228 » Mon Mar 28, 2011 11:32 pm

ok what comical or weird spectacles have you come across whilst paddling? I saw a bike being lobbed into our local river (high tide) from the footbridge one sat night from the riverside pub and when i paddled past it next morning (low tide) it was gone and not from the water no doubt.

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Re: Whats the weirdest thing you have seen whilst paddling

Post by hereorkayaking » Mon Mar 28, 2011 11:46 pm

I feel sorry for a group of English boaters paddling the Cerveyrette in the French alps in June 2010.

The group pulled into a layby that my group had been Bivi'ing in. Checked out the water levels, asked what i knew of the river. At this point i was one of the only people up, getting the kettle on.
About 20/30 mins later my good friend Pete has woken up told us hes going for a bath and that enless we wanted to cop an eyeful of naked man then we shouldnt go down stream.
A few mins later and cue the kayaking group, they round a corner and find Pete stark naked in the middle of the river with a bar of soap (standing as it was too cold to sit).

Im terribly sorry if you where in this group.


Another one was paddling on Dartmoor. Nice little boof in centre of the river. Went for it, but it moved, wasnt a rock, but a pig, the snout was creating a good sized rooster tail! Horrid.

Steve
If in doubt, boof left.

Steve Davies

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Re: Whats the weirdest thing you have seen whilst paddling

Post by DaveBland » Tue Mar 29, 2011 4:45 am

The weirdest sight I remember was that trib that flows into the start of the Glasgow Avon with all the cars in it. When we paddled it, it was a raging torrent of bright yellow toxic water, flowing round dumped and mangled Ford Escorts requiring some nimble slalom moves.
Does anyone remember what that toxic dump is called?
dave

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morsey
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Re: Whats the weirdest thing you have seen whilst paddling

Post by morsey » Tue Mar 29, 2011 8:05 am

DaveBland wrote:Does anyone remember what that toxic dump is called?
Glasgow!

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Re: Whats the weirdest thing you have seen whilst paddling

Post by Toby » Tue Mar 29, 2011 8:08 am

morsey wrote:
DaveBland wrote:Does anyone remember what that toxic dump is called?
Glasgow!
Scotland?
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justin-g
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Re: Whats the weirdest thing you have seen whilst paddling

Post by justin-g » Tue Mar 29, 2011 8:11 am

A seal in the big pool above the rollercoaster on the Wairoa in New Zealand. A mink in the Melte gorge.
White water "rider"

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quicky
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Re: Whats the weirdest thing you have seen whilst paddling

Post by quicky » Tue Mar 29, 2011 8:13 am

Dead bloated cow in the Dee just below Sandy Lane, All you could see was this massice bloated backside till you got up close. Apparently they quite often go for swims by mistake.

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Re: Whats the weirdest thing you have seen whilst paddling

Post by Croft » Tue Mar 29, 2011 8:14 am

Six massive vultures sitting right across the top of a rapid - what did they know that we didn't? - really spooky. (But we ran it anyway and nothing horrid happened)
Ian Beecroft - old-timer amateur boater

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Re: Whats the weirdest thing you have seen whilst paddling

Post by Easan » Tue Mar 29, 2011 1:22 pm

Whilst slalom training under Perth bridge many moons ago, I heard dozens of Police / Fire / Ambulance sirens passing over the bridge. I didn't think anything of it at the time. About 20 mins later there were two guys swimming in the river downstream of the arch I was under. At first I thought it was a couple of local dafties larking about, but then noticed they were wearing dry suits. At that, the guy yells over, "Hey son, give us a tow to shore!?"
I paddled over to help out, as one of the guys was struggling to swim. As I emerged from the bridge arch beside them, I faced the bank to give the guy the tail of my boat. As I did so I looked up to the bank to see about 20 - 30 service personnel (Police / Fire / Ambulance & Army) lining the bank. I don't know why, by I suddenly got very nervous. I could not figure out what the hell was going on.
As I got to shore a couple of the army guys waded in right past me to the guy on the back of my boat. "Careful!", and, "Watch it!" were yelled a couple of times as one of the army guys waded by me holding a shell.
Not the seaside kind, but the rusty World War 2 military kind!
There was a bit of a cartoon, GULP moment on my part, whilst staring at the shell they were now delicately placing on the gravel bank. A heft thump on my back and a "Cheers Son", brought me back to my senses.
"Yeah, cheers mate", was all I managed as I sprinted back underneath the bridge arch for a bit of protection.

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Re: Whats the weirdest thing you have seen whilst paddling

Post by Adrian Cooper » Tue Mar 29, 2011 1:37 pm

In a similar vein to Steve, a group of friends were on the Upper dart in winter of course. They arrived just below Surprise Surprise to see a couple of naked ladies draped over rocks apparrently part of a photo-shoot. They then covered themselves up. It must have been really cold!

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Re: Whats the weirdest thing you have seen whilst paddling

Post by Lancs_lad » Tue Mar 29, 2011 1:40 pm

A couple getting busy on the rocks river right as you go through Garnett bridge on the Sprint. Think they were as shocked to see me as I was them. They quickly ran off back into the Holiday let on the bridge.

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Re: Whats the weirdest thing you have seen whilst paddling

Post by slaughter950 » Tue Mar 29, 2011 1:47 pm

Years ago while paddling down the Ardeche with the scouts, we came across a naked man climbing up the side of a cliff and then proceeding to jump off into the river. And you wonder why people call the french mental.
Adam Slaughter.

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Martyn Hartley
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Re: Whats the weirdest thing you have seen whilst paddling

Post by Martyn Hartley » Tue Mar 29, 2011 2:06 pm

A few years back we had just got off the Etive, and on climbing back to the road were very surprised to see mist or fog swirling around. A few seconds later we were even more surprised when a horse emerged from the mist carrying a Knight in full shiny armour. Things became a little clearer as the mist thinned and could then see the film crew, complete with fog machine...

I suppose we probably looked a little out of place in that film..

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Re: Whats the weirdest thing you have seen whilst paddling

Post by hereorkayaking » Tue Mar 29, 2011 2:25 pm

slaughter950 wrote:Years ago while paddling down the Ardeche with the scouts, we came across a naked man climbing up the side of a cliff and then proceeding to jump off into the river. And you wonder why people call the french mental.
I've got an ardeche story to trump that one.

A couple of years ago I was river leading on the ardeche. On the rapid named madaline ( where for those of you that arnt familiar with this area, a nudist campsite is located 500m down stream. The rapid is a shoot that fires straight into a rather large boulder and there's a cheeky little cushion wave above to throw you off course and fire you into the boulder. )

One of the boats in my group was a group of two girls aged about fifteen. They where distracted by various naked people draped over the the rock. They inevitably crashed into the rock and capsized. They washed up in an Eddy on river right that's slightly recircling and they couldn't climb out of the slippery rocks onto the bank. There was an elderly gentleman stark naked save a cane and a straw hat. He was trying to help the girls out but they where too busy looking at me ands their teacher with a look of HELP was which. Was so funny we couldn't move. Eventually I had to paddle across and an put them in my boat. .
Steve
If in doubt, boof left.

Steve Davies

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Chrace
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Re: Whats the weirdest thing you have seen whilst paddling

Post by Chrace » Tue Mar 29, 2011 2:53 pm

On the Lune we paddled past a dead sheep floating upside down in an eddy. Except when we passed it the legs started running in the air. So one of our group jumped in and pulled it out after which it ran away, very wet but very alive.

And I know a lot of people have seen similar but I still think the most surprising to me was paddling around a corner on a rapid on the Gyronde and in addition to the normal rocks having to avoid a rather large yellow digger in the middle of the flow. The guy was pretty cool about it, lifted the arm and we passed under it. Seemed completely nomal to him but to us it was just so out of place.

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Re: Whats the weirdest thing you have seen whilst paddling

Post by Strad » Tue Mar 29, 2011 3:23 pm

I remember many years ago paddling the waterways around the back of Southmere to see a dead body floating face down in the river, one of the other instructors took our group of scouts past as close as possible to the other side of the river while I paddled over to the body. As I got closer I realised that it was a partially dressed 'inflatable lady' floating face down....

I also had the strange experience of catching a divers regulator while fishing from a SoT on Lake Michigan, just a regulator with about 6 inches of hose attached, not sure why but on a calm and misty day it somehow felt a little sinister. (And no I don't think a diver had been attached when I caught it...)
Old School?? I miss my AQII..
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Tea Boy Tom
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Re: Whats the weirdest thing you have seen whilst paddling

Post by Tea Boy Tom » Tue Mar 29, 2011 3:25 pm

Martyn Hartley wrote:A few years back we had just got off the Etive, and on climbing back to the road were very surprised to see mist or fog swirling around. A few seconds later we were even more surprised when a horse emerged from the mist carrying a Knight in full shiny armour. Things became a little clearer as the mist thinned and could then see the film crew, complete with fog machine...

I suppose we probably looked a little out of place in that film..
I remember seeing that too. I gave them a cheery honk of the horn and yelled 'Bus W*****s' out of the window to add to the medieval ambience of their shoot.
One time, doing the shuttle for the Ogwen, me and Pete Catterall were bombing down the old road towards the take out. It's the old turnpike and has a few laybys. In one of these was a car parked up with a couple at it full chat on the front seat. I laughed so hard I nearly clipped the wall...
I'm sure Randy Fandango saw Fred Dibnah chug past on a traction engine once. He'll probably clarify this at some point.

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Re: Whats the weirdest thing you have seen whilst paddling

Post by Mike M » Tue Mar 29, 2011 3:28 pm

Many years ago doing a slalom up at Middleton In Tees. As is the way the weather turned horrendous with torrential rain & absolute Gale Force wind. The slalom got cancelled as it was now deemed unsafe due to the rising water levels & ridicuously high winds. A couple of us got on for a "play" & were rather taken aback to round a bend to find a caravan in the middle of the river (blown in from the field where a number are stored over winter) It just bobbed around in the middle of the river & then disintergrated completely scattering all manner of bedding & soft furnishings everywhere.

Corsica was not so much weird but entertaining in deciding we would bbq one evening but did n't have a grill. We just got on our nearest river to the campsite and paddled a short way until we found what we were after. A fridge where upon we removed the shelves & once we'd removed the plastic coverings off made excellent racks. Weird that you can find a fridge so quickly but a bit sad that we knew this was n't going to be a problem due to the amount of rubbish that get dumped into rivers over there.

Naked bathers in France...............too many tales to mention (& we also had a yellow digger in the river on the Gyr to add to the excitement)
Born to paddle................forced to work.

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Re: Whats the weirdest thing you have seen whilst paddling

Post by thetangoman » Tue Mar 29, 2011 5:07 pm

Mike M wrote:Naked bathers in France...............too many tales to mention (& we also had a yellow digger in the river on the Gyr to add to the excitement)
We had a yellow digger on the Gyr attempt to rescue a pair of paddles following a swim by one of our group members. He tried to use the arm on the back to get them mid-flow - he missed them and they were never seen again.

Andy

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Re: Whats the weirdest thing you have seen whilst paddling

Post by Randy Fandango » Tue Mar 29, 2011 5:31 pm

Tea Boy Tom wrote: I'm sure Randy Fandango saw Fred Dibnah chug past on a traction engine once. He'll probably clarify this at some point.
Ah yes indeed. I was rather surprised once when teaching open boating on Southmere lake to hear the whistle of a steam engine. The nearest railway was reasonably close but electric and in the other direction.
All became clear when Fred Dibnah trundled into view down the road from the Crossness engines at the helm of his trusty traction engine, hotly pursued by the film crew filming what turned out to be his last ever TV series.
Ever the consummate professional, he managed to completely ignore the yells of "Oi Dibnaaaaaaaah!!" coming from my group's direction and got his take in one.
Weird things on rivers?
Two dead bodies (meaty skeletons with only three legs between them) in an eddy on the Kali Gandaki and the strange sight of a British kayak coach standing beside a Corsican river wearing only what appeared to be a small towel concealing a medium sized traffic cone waving cheerily at a passing group of rather bemused Czech paddlers after they'd interrupted him as he.... Well. I actually have no idea. He says he was washing.... :-)
Giles

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Re: Whats the weirdest thing you have seen whilst paddling

Post by HarryWats0n » Tue Mar 29, 2011 8:39 pm

On the Lune we paddled past a dead sheep floating upside down in an eddy. Except when we passed it the legs started running in the air. So one of our group jumped in and pulled it out after which it ran away, very wet but very alive.
I heard a story about a coach at Brenin, but i'm not sure about its credibility. This coach was supposedly out walking with his girlfriend along a riverbank. She spotted a sheep in the river and told him to get in and rescue it. He stripped down to his underwear, waded in and rescued the sheep, where he took it to the bank. Whilst proceeding to give this sheep mouth to mouth, intending to keep it quiet the minibus full of his fellow coaches drove passed and saw everything!

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Re: Whats the weirdest thing you have seen whilst paddling

Post by sshearing228 » Tue Mar 29, 2011 9:59 pm

Adrian Cooper wrote:In a similar vein to Steve, a group of friends were on the Upper dart in winter of course. They arrived just below Surprise Surprise to see a couple of naked ladies draped over rocks apparrently part of a photo-shoot. They then covered themselves up. It must have been really cold!

Did you get any photos then?

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Re: Whats the weirdest thing you have seen whilst paddling

Post by Evil-Cod » Tue Mar 29, 2011 10:59 pm

Whilst out doing a bit of spate boating through the middle of St Andrews with a couple of mates we jaw a bike. One of the pair of mates had recently had his stolen/drunkly forgotten to lock it up. The other friend then joked that this was his bike in the river hardly visible. Upon closer inspection it actually was... Took a while to get it out but we managed. It never worked again but that didn't seem to matter.

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Re: Whats the weirdest thing you have seen whilst paddling

Post by Yaker Dan » Tue Mar 29, 2011 11:54 pm

Hmm seen nature at its best for sure, a few odd things with hire groups.

So far, the canoe with 2 chaps drinking cocktails from their DIY plyboard opticts bar wins the prize for me.

Paddling past with a novice group and 3/4 through a safty wise intro river trip, it was hard to answer questions without smiling.

Happy paddling
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Re: Whats the weirdest thing you have seen whilst paddling

Post by Croft » Wed Mar 30, 2011 7:47 am

The fine rapid created by a bus in the depths of the Moraca canyon in Montenegro.
Ian Beecroft - old-timer amateur boater

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Re: Whats the weirdest thing you have seen whilst paddling

Post by Seedy Paddler » Wed Mar 30, 2011 9:55 am

Way back in student days, WWR training on the Don in Seaton, Aberdeen. Shot the weir to paddle down to the sea and back and half way down a diver popped his head up just about where my paddle was about to enter the water, not sure who got the bigger surprise.

Turned out to be the police underwater search team looking for a missing ghillie from upstream.

Also found a full TV News Broadcast team doing an article on salmon poaching helped recover a cage off the weir and was rewarded with the fish trapped inside - the flat ate well that week!

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Re: Whats the weirdest thing you have seen whilst paddling

Post by Huck It » Wed Mar 30, 2011 3:26 pm

While paddling down the river Main in N.I to one of the main drops which is beside a very nice hotel a couple from a wedding party had wandered to the what they percieved as a nice quiet spot in the woods right beside the river for a quick shag. Wasnt so quiet when we paddled in ammusement!

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Re: Whats the weirdest thing you have seen whilst paddling

Post by mudlark » Wed Mar 30, 2011 10:45 pm

Another Ardeche story....Paddling with a group through a nudist colony on a very grey rainy day, we passed a gentleman nudist fishing part of the way down a rapid. Due to the weather he was wearing a plastic mac - a clear plastic mac !

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Re: Whats the weirdest thing you have seen whilst paddling

Post by Gavin. » Wed Mar 30, 2011 10:51 pm

While paddling the Northesk enjoying a nice Sunday paddle I spotted a sheep in a tree 12 feet above the water.

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Re: Whats the weirdest thing you have seen whilst paddling

Post by sparrow » Thu Mar 31, 2011 9:29 pm

A pot bobbing down the River Indus alongside our group spilling its contents of human ashes into the water. Himalayan weirdness!

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